Fearless Flood Fighter Gifts

"Hargrove, what's all this I hear about your living in constant fear of the polar ice caps melting?"

"We'll always have Paris..."

'I don't care what the blueprints say, I'm certain HE strongly suggested a roof.'

"I intend to stay in this job, come Hell or high water."

"I can see our house from here."

'Okay, Noah...I'm going to tell you again. Listen very carefully this time.'

'Don't worry, the first 30 years of dealing with emergency plumbing problems are the hardest.'

"I just got a text message from our dehumidifier. It says it doesn't know how much more of this rain it can take."

'Jimmie, run and tell your dad the tractor is flooded.'

Wally flunks the test: The Emergency Broadcast System.

'Expecting a bit of wet weather Reg...?'

'...and the property lies in a beautiful valley by the banks of the river...'

'Two pencils approach Noah's ark.'

Noah wears hearing protection as animals howl.

"We have to recognise that severe weather events are becoming more common. . ."

'I've been plagued with worry over rising water levels, so...'

'Have you filed an environmental impact statement for this flood?'

"Every once in a while this house comes with a pool."

"I thought you meant we had a security leak."

"Yes, Mr. Willis, it's definitely rising damp."

Climate Change Contingency House

Damp? Only when the tide is very, very high.

"....rather than spend millions on a potentially fruitless effort to avoid flooding we've decided to focus on public safety!"

"When the rubber duck reaches eye level it's a flood. . . wow, brilliant!"

"It was a professional hit..."

'It's the Environment Agency. They're sending a leaflet on how to grow gills.'

'Do you suppose we might qualify for asylum in Holland?'

Honey, wake up

Chelsea flower show sewage

"Ned is getting ready for the oceans to rise."

'If you can smile when everything around you is going wrong... you're probably in the repair business!'

'Should we upgrade the levees or just go hydroponic?'

'It's the plumber ... '

"Actually we were hoping for something a little more sensible..."

Master Plumber