Fauna Foodie Gifts

"Come on, smile, it's for our food blog..."

"I forgot to take a pic of the tacos."

"Fee-fi-fo-fum, I smell Thursday's gluten-free lasagna!"

"Grass...Grass and more damn grass... What I wouldn't give for a lightly poached Dover sole with a garlic infused tarragon sauce."

'You're supposed to just lick the cone!'

"Hi, Honey. For dinner we're having Shis Kabob."

'I had the recipe upside down, so it's beefed corn.'

'I'd like the tongue, please.'

'I've got it written down...'

"Where's my order!? This service is terrible! That stuff will be cold by the time it gets here!! What's the hold-up!?!"

"Today's special is puréed sweet potato on cracker."

Bedside Manna.

"I can never remember, how much do we tip?"

"Finish your anchovies and then you can evolve."

"Every time my wife has an accident in the kitchen, I end up eating it. . ."

"For what you are about to receive..."

'No collar, no din-din,' said Mrs. Flint firmly. 'Omigosh,' thought Larry, 'Fifi will never give it back!'

The Chef's dumplings were his speciality.

'These are my dieting glasses. They magnify the food so I think I'm eating more than I really am.'

Party Animal, Party Vegetable, Party Mineral

"Don't be fooled, it looks easy but I've yet to meet a dog who's mastered it."

"All our water is locally sourced. From a little something we call 'the kitchen faucet'."

"Combination No. 5--no MSG."

"Oh, for God's sake, Harold, please close your mouth when you chew your food! This is a fancy restaurant."

What's For Dessert

"In my view, management overrates the motivational appeal of mackerel."

Welcome at the Healthful Restaurant. We allow neither cholesterol, GM food, colourings, dust nor guests.

'This placenta's not very filling, I think I'll nip out for a pizza.'

"I'll have the business prodigy's lunch."

'What have you got today?' - 'If you don't smell it, we haven't got it.'

'You heard right - a large pizza, half pepperoni, half mice.'

"Got any Salmon"