Father-son Competitors Gifts

I like beating my dad at chess.

Young golf ball getting "the talk".

Yummy Mummies

'I love doing things with you, Dad but couldn't you just coach my soccer team?'

"Tommy? Hi, this is daddy. How's my big boy? Sweetie, daddy needs your help."

"You don't need a duck call. I can just download this Find-a-Fowl app."

'There's a planet in my book with two moons! Imagine how much howling we could do there!'

"Son, the world is full of disappointments. About 7.7 billion of them."

'Wait! Let's see if he gets up on his own.'

"I want to have at least two children - I have too much guilt to give for just one."

'A boy at school was named after his father. They've called him Dad.'

'Dad, can I borrow the club tonight?'

Boy on father's knee

"Ben, forget... what... I'd said about... plastics!"

"I am wearing sunglasses and using sunscreen with 50% UV protection. What could possibly go wrong?"

GPS, satellite dish, cell phone...nature awaits. All right, Pop. Nature awaits!

"Let's face it, Dad. If you really thought I was my own man, you'd give me a raise in my allowance."

'I know I'm your father, but I'm also your attorney and these father-son talks are considered billable hours.'

'Son, someday you're going to be short all of this.'

'Let daddy know if you get a bite.'

"Just be proud we're the first father-son ice dancing team."

Take-Your-Child-To-Work-Day

"Do I read better than Mommy?"

'My kid is going to Harvard, and Jim's son to Stanford- which college accepted yoyr kid, Fred? ( pix of clown on desk)

"Looks like Dad has finally given up on trying to beat us at chess."

'Don't take it too hard, Dad, Mr. Hodes down the street is just having a great year.'

'It's a tough world, son. You inflate. You get kicked around all your life. Then one day - bam! You deflate.'

As a boy, Isaac Newton ignored his father's advice to persevere, preferring instead to let things drop.

"I could never please my father. Whenever I did something he didn't approve of, he'd threaten to go public."

"Baldo, I think we should meet once a week for dinner."

'A couple of the other dads and I were thinking of starting up a fight club. . . you in?'

Dads.

'And the coolest dad of the year award goes to... Dr. Armstrong for his note, 'to whom it may concern, my son is allergic to homework'.'

'Float this last lower left premolar, will you please?'

"Don't interrupt your father when he's on the bong."