Fashion Statement Maker Gifts

"I'd like to have myself declared legally blonde."

Make Red Hats Apolitical Again

"Hello - anyone about?"

"Hang on - these t-shirts are so cheap I'm a bit suspicious about where they were made."

Domino fans

'I wonder if we can retrain your beard.'

'Are you going to keep that silly mustache for all eternity?'

'When did you get a tattoo...'

'What's with the hat?'

'Harold is taking absolutely no chances on getting skin cancer.'

'I kept telling him he shouldn't wear his red cardigan.'

'Do you have a hat for every day of the week, Clancy?'

"My mum said the only way I could get a tattoo was over her dead body."

Look at the Big Picture

"I think she's fully committed to me - She got an 'I'm with stupid' TATTOO!"

'I use the trouser press on everything.'

"What's good for post-tattoo depression?"

"This is my new protest shirt. I bought it as an online bargain!"

"If you wore fewer piercings people might get to work on time."

Fake Tattoo T-shirt

"I'm having second thoughts about my new bunny tattoo. I think it might make me look too scary and dangerous?"

Jake decided to wear a suit for the first day of his new job.

"I'm Punk Punzel! My sister Ra does this 'Let-Your-Hair-Down' thing. She lives over there!"

'Ignore him...he's so middle ground.'

"Don't rush me, I can't find nothing to wear."

"It's all right, Howard. They're all stick-ons."

"He said he wasn't mad, just disappointed."

A girl wearing a t-shirt saying ', la'

"I warned you that tattoo wouldn't change colour."

"My husband's in advertising."

"I don't like losing control and murdering people, but I've grown quite partial to the hat."

'What the heck? They're not cows, sheep, pigs, tigers, cats or unicorns: They're kids in onesies!'

'What do you suggest we do with the other 2,000 yards?'

Unfair Tattoo

'Bow ties are a bit like honesty, Stogg. Self-indulgent, and therefore best left at home when banking.'