Fashion-forward Drinker Gifts

Prosecco Drinker

Pony express. Pony express yourself. Pony express yourself so much he left.

'At least we look cool. Especially with the wind chill factor.'

Rap music

"I don't like your application."

"So what's this special distracting tactic you've developed?"

"Amazing! It's the season of me!"

Redhead

"A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single malt."

Rainbow skier

"I love blue Martinis. It's like the fifties and the nineties all mixed up together."

'...but since no fossils of dinosaur clothing have yet been found, what you see here is mostly speculation.'

"Late Jurassic is so Retro..."

Social Struggles

Chippunks

A Wolf in Sheep's Clothing.

"It's off the rack. The guy on the rack doesn't need it anymore."

'You're never going to win any race in those platform shoes.'

"How am I looking for my first day back at work?"

"Just think, someday we'll be considered 'retro'."

'I like to stay fit. Or at least wear a lot of lycra.'

"How much more for pinstripes?"

"I want you to work late. Put on your overtime shoes."

"Hold on a minute, will you? I just want to see what color Charlie Rose's tie is tonight."

"Apparently, the golf clothes and expensive golf clubs didn't help you play better."

'Is that a wig?'

'I imagine you're interested in one of the more highly visible occupations?'

Smart meter. Smarter meter

"Do you have any questions apart from 'where did I get my jazzy tie'?"

A guardsman is embarrassed when the wind reveals his bearskin hat is doubling as a 'comb over'.

"Which one more says 'Cool Guy?'"

Man admiring his friend's skull topped scarf pin

'Gus! Get over here and see what our tattoos used to look like!'

Down at the Local Baa-Baa Shop

'Call me a slave to fashion, but how do I get down from these without killing myself?'