Farmyard Diplomat Gifts

'Ok, they want a year's supply of meal, no more shearing, just trimming and our own barn. But until then, this camera and the pictures of your 'date with Daisy' stay with me.'

Growl - Hiss Conflict Resolution Meeting

"Lost my job. But I'm pretty sure it's around here somewhere."

"Look, he just wants to apologize for scaring the daylights out of you yesterday. ... Mr. Squirrel? ..."

"This happens everytime someone asks to speak to the head of the household."

Diner

'We consult those with whom we agree, which is why I rarely consult my conscience.'

"If we're a team, the manager should take the heat!"

"Honey, come quick! This guy in the comments section just solved the Middle East crisis."

Playground reputation.

'If Mom says no, you ask Dad -- it's called the 'checks and balances' system.'

"I'm bilingual. I can talk to parents and step parents."

'I had to stamp down on staff using nicknames at work. They even had one for me!'

'Dad, I don't need a two-thirds majority to over-ride your veto. I've got mom.'

'I know that other kids manage on ?5 pocket money - but their parents don't charge them to watch any television programme their parents don't happen to approve off!'

What really happened on the EVER GIVEN

Who posted the hilarious pics of you with the goofy haircut? Not sure. Someone who wants to humiliate me. One of the usual cyber bullies. No. Meaner. Hmm

How's the boss today? Should I push his buttons or pull his chain?

"Keep up the good work and there'll probably be a nice promotion in it for me."

Conflict Resolution Training - Cancelled Due To Disagreement Over Venue.

"I can't hold it together much longer. . . If Bradley doesn't wipe that smug, self-satisfied smirk off his face soon, I swear I'll kill him."

'I take it this department has had conflicts.'

"The new boss might seem severe, but he won't bite your head off!"

'You wouldn't believe how hard it is for me to unwind after work.'

'I don't want anything for myself...But if it's not too much trouble, please send my mother a son-in-law who's a Doctor...'

'...and what do doctors recommend for pain?'

Landing That Tough Account

'They aren't shy about cutting you out of the decision making process.'

'A mediator hasn't worked, so I brought in everyone's moms.'

'Miss Kress, who on our staff is in charge of denials and uncomfortable realities.'

'He pats my back, but I don't pat his.'

"You’ll meet a beautiful woman whom your mother will loathe."

'Let's arbitrate.'

"Come pick me up. This is going nowhere,"

Avoiding bosses on stairs vs. elevator.