Farm Storytellers T-Shirts

'I became Free-Range a long time ago when I managed to pick the lock of my cage and escape...'

'It's not easy being green on grass!'

'We use to tiptoe through the tulips. . . now we just waddle through the weeds.'

"Just kick back and enjoy this. These are the nest years of our lives!"

'She barely made it out of the atmosphere... next!'

"I always knew you'd come back."

'I think he's got a bad case of Bluetooth Disease.'

"You're living in a fantasy world, Nelly. Farmer Dave doesn't know you're alive. Plus, he's a human being, he's married, he's the church pastor and he's secretly gay."

"Oh, you haven’t seen holiday drama ‘till you’ve met our little family."

Objects in mirror bear no relation to reality.

"While the chef's dishes tonight are rather bland, his ideas are fresh and appealing."

'Hey Sally, do these new capris make me look pretentious?'

'Nonsense! They can't All have headaches.'

The Mongolian Steps Slinky Cows.

The Perfect Garden.

'Your barn door's open.'

'I guess everything's okay, doc, two legs is showing, one out of each hole."

'Well, no, I wouldn't say I'm a mad cow, although Farmer Brown does get on my nerves once in a while!'

"A beautiful baby. Who does he take after?"

Behind the cow is a manure castle. 'Yeah...It's a gift.'

'Looks like we've got ourselves another cow jacking.'

'Bad news is Tim Turkey is dead, the good news is I've made a wish!'

A centi-stampede.

I would ask you to cease and desist from sitting on my burrow!

"Hold your horses! I'm working as fast as I can!

'So...you claim Farmer Jones kept you locked up naked in a dirty sty, fed nothing but garbage and repetitively called you a filthy swine!'

Mrs Smith and her daughter - now and 40 years later...

"I didn't mean to trample him. How do you say 'my bad' in human?"

'So much for your 'Big Brother!''

Thanks for the heads up on the gelatinous cube!

'So I guess it's New Year!'

"My job is not as easy as it looks: You have to learn about astronomy and celestial mechanics to be able to accurately predict sunrise and sunset..."

'I never did a pregnancy exam on a ewe before.'

Sheep has it's fur shorn into a tutu.

"This next song's about our desperate struggle to please and chronic craving for approval. I really, really hope you like it."