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Mascot for hot dog stand buys a hot dog.

When angels go awry.

Loterie Francaise...

Chuck had always found the black glasses thing a bit depressing.

". . . The chef looks like he could spit on my food."

"The skip has skipped to my loo!"

One day having a great personality was going to become a crucial evolutionary trait...

"Bless You."

"Anything in the fridge ma. . . ? I'm starving."

Unemployed man given role as the 'gluten fairy'.

"My older self travels back just to remind me to put the cap back on this pen?"

'I didn't dedicate my book, A Lifetime of Wine Tasting, to my 3 ex-wives and nine kids, because they made it possible. I did it because they made it necessary.'

"I'm not here to slay you. I'm here to talk to you about diversifying your investment portfolio."

Molecules You Ought to be Aware of.

"Don't shave it. It gives your face character."

Odd Angles,a monthly strip on coarse angling.

Goat about goat: 'He's no longer gruff since he's been on Prozac.'

Introducing...Anagraman.

Cow talking to dog: 'What...You eat your own...?!'

'If he could trace the matching sock I've another 25 or 30 to account for.'

"Why the gumboots? Well, I can't stand slimy things touching my feet..."

Mystery Solved - Boxers or Briefs, 'Thanks but you could have just told me.'

'Check out the old dude.'

"If you think you made a stink pulling the fruit, try pulling His finger."

Overshadowed by the Tony's: Broadway's Lesser Known Awards

"Sorry, dear... I don't have a pumpkin spiced flat white chai latte. I just have this one..."

'It's the same everywhere: body over brains.'

Next year, we are NOT going to Costco.

"Got any bathtub gin?"

'It's a zen diaphragm.'

The Pencil and Sharpener

'No, I didn't know it was hunting season - why do you ask?'

"I now pronounce you a partial place setting."

Armed dogs wait for hot dog vendor.

'Next Please...' (Joe's Sharpening Service).