Famous Faces Fanatic Pillows

People leave joke shop with false moustache, nose and glasses marketed as 'the Robert Winston'.

Prize vegetables.

"Unfortunately, once the child contracts Pokémon, he lives with it forever."

'Gosh, really? You've never been on any reality show at all?'

"Harry Potter and the People Who Care Way Too Much About Harry Potter"

Science fiction fans on other planets

"Hold on, that's my Mom dressed up like 'Xena, Princess Warrior'....real mature, Mom!"

Maps to the homes of guys with friends who know some of the limo drivers of the personal trainers of the stars.

"You're not a real fan. You're just dressed up like a slut for attention."

'It's one of the candidates for baptism. Wants to know if he can hold the hand that shook Elvis's hand above the water.'

The good news is that I've got all the figures...the BAD news is that I'm not sure what order to put them in!

"Depressed, anxious, worried about the future we've had a great deal of this recently...I'd suggest you avoid watching England for a while."

Sales

"An appointment? Let's see... She could fit you in before breakfast TV, or after lunch on Radio Two, or between Radio Four afternoon and the Drive Home SHow..."

"You can get good cards but still have terrible luck."

"I asked a designer to come in and give the office a needed pick-me-up...probably should have been a little more specific."

A Friend in Need.

Street painter puts real face on man with happy face.

'Creamed beets freak me out.'

Flo was mortified when she discovered that her web cam was broadcasting when she was testing out possible new looks.

"Apricot pit?! Are you kidding, Mister? This stuff knocks raw avocado and almond nut outta the water!!!"

"Chills, Randy. I feel chills. And I can't move." "And I can't remember the last time my palms were this sweaty." "This must've been what people felt like when they heard the Allies were finally invading Normandy on D-Day." "No way any movie can live up to this hype." "Wolverine day is almost upon us." "We are about to embark upon the great crusade..."

"It's a deal. Help me find the acorns I buried and I'll help you find your bones."

'Your mum says it's okay for you to sleep over in my pouch.'

Vannamania

"Do you think my followers will mind of 'Martin's Theory of Everything' ends after just three installments?"

'For heaven's sake, Armitage... Can't you just accept 2nd place in the best leek category??'

"Although a face transplant is theoretically possible you still can't have Brad Pitt's."

'They sat in an etape, playing bezique and swilling skookum saloop.'

"Meet JD Salinger's neighbors"

Everybody is having a great time! I'm more than just the party host --- I'm the master of my fete!

"Don't leave me dangling!"

Celebrity Books.

"I can guarantee it's the latest thing...until the next thing arrives."

Justin Bieber