Family Secret Gifts

'There's something I never told you about your father, Billy. He was a lawyer.'

"Oh, sorry - Open Sesame, PLEASE."

"Gracie, today I'm teaching you a Bermudez family tradition...passed down from generation to generation! Vamonos! Out! Now!"

Secret sweetie drawer...

'Where's the elephant cemetery? It's a secret, and anyway, you'd be the last person I'd tell!'

"I couldn't have made my family recipe raisin date nut cake with it's secret ingredient without Jimmy's help."

"I've got something to tell you,Dad-I don't like fish...I mean I REALLY don't like fish...I HATE fish,Dad-there,I've said it now."

"Here's a buck, kid... Don't tell your mom I snuck out of my retirement home!"

"...then click 'save settings', scroll down to 'done' and voila! You're on Facebook stalking Miriam's daughter's new husband."

"It's my box of secrets. It has things I've thought about but would never tell anyone!"

"It's good to see that... ...Tia Carmen teaching Gracie valuable family traditions passed down through the generations."

'I don't know what's going on, but wipe that look of restrained jubilation off your face!'

'It's time you knew, Son -- you were abandoned here as a child by aliens.'

"I'm pretty sure your grandma's secret apple pie recipe is not considered an unauthorized classified document."

'Darling... I think we're being watched!'

"No, I thought YOU put the picnic basket in the car."

It's time you know the truth about your father.

Watergate is just the tip of the iceberg phobia. 'I have here secret government documents that describe the events leading up to Custer's Last Stand.'

'Are you on any medication other than your Grandma's chicken soup?'

"Jack'z the bestess friend. My wife still doesn't know where we'were that night..." Why we toast before we start drinking.

Harold's suspicions are finally confirmed - 'Son, you're adopted!'

'What do you mean, you don't want to dry grapes in the sun for dessert wines, like your father? He's a big success--and only 32!'

"Thank you for coming with me. This is a sacred family tradition."

"Can you keep a secret?"

'Promise me that this won't go any further?'

'They transferred me from catering because I kept spilling the beans.'

"Dad...how do you know when to stop?"

Awkward Moments

'Daddy doesn't know why birds migrate. Ask me about ways to avoid probate.'

'Let's not mention this to the fellas at the office, okay, Hal?'

"Psst. Can you keep a secret?"

"Son, the reason you're not happy like me is because your real father was an oyster.'

"D'ya wanna hear a secret? Well, keep it under your wrappings. . ."

'Sparky's amazing ability to speak to humans betrays him...'

"Mum, stop it, this isn't reality T.V.!" "Shh or I'll vote you out."