Family Meal Strategist T-Shirts

'Funny you should say you've given up finishing your kids' food off - I've resolved to live entirely off what mine leave.'

"See? I told you changing his food would be traumatizing."

A woman standing beside a stove full of steaming pots and pans.

Chez Nous Menu

"Who ordered the double chocolate parfait with a cherry on top?"

'I'm worried about him, he eats his vegetables, but not his dessert!'

"Mom, does the Russian borscht you made for dinner give me foreign-policy experience?"

"I have a feeling he understands more than we think."

"Be sure and eat your frozen vegetables."

"No thanks, I brought my lunch."

'Thanksgiving's no holiday for turkeys or the women who cook them.'

'Men order. . . women shop.'

"Can you turn these mashed potatoes into french fries?"

Making healthy substitutions at mealtime

'Well, if you're going to order 'left wings' and I'm going to order 'right,' maybe we should just order burgers instead.'

"When it comes to turkeys, Mom, you sure know your stuff-ing."

"Can you reinvent the classic grilled cheese for me?"

A man and baby wearing bibs

"I recommend number five if you have only $20 so that you can still leave a tip."

'A hacker broke into our computer and, in an act of human kindness, deleted your mother's recipe for peppers and meat loaf.'

'We can't move in with my parents - they've moved in with grandma!'

"Ok, Griffin — let him see Mom’s roast!"

'I'm saving some for leftovers tomorrow.'

"You're close, but you're not the record. The record for one family in one booth—all from out of state, each ordering a complete breakfast—was set in 1978, with fifteen."

"All good things must come to an end...unless I use both of my giant-size super-pots."

'Dad, I don't need a two-thirds majority to over-ride your veto. I've got mom.'

'If you're happy to demand feed we'll get along just fine.'

"Mum, why can't we just have a normal Sunday roast like other families?"

"Mother will never be able to rest on her laurels. If they're green, she'll cook them."

Non-wall St merger: Mom's Home Cooking...Pop's Cafe!

"Mom told me to make my vegetables disapear."

"The chef recommends the most expensive dish on the menu."

'After you with the camouflage.'

"I mean, he does have a point."