Family Meal Coordinator T-Shirts

"Be sure and eat your frozen vegetables."

"See? I told you changing his food would be traumatizing."

A woman standing beside a stove full of steaming pots and pans.

"Who ordered the double chocolate parfait with a cherry on top?"

Chez Nous Menu

"I'm afraid the challah got a little burnt this week."

'I'm worried about him, he eats his vegetables, but not his dessert!'

"Mom, does the Russian borscht you made for dinner give me foreign-policy experience?"

'Thanksgiving's no holiday for turkeys or the women who cook them.'

"Can you turn these mashed potatoes into french fries?"

"Vegetables, vegetables, vegetables, welcome to my dystopian world!"

Making healthy substitutions at mealtime

"Tia Carmen, if you had a bucket list, what would you put in it?"

A man and baby wearing bibs

"When it comes to turkeys, Mom, you sure know your stuff-ing."

"Can you reinvent the classic grilled cheese for me?"

'A hacker broke into our computer and, in an act of human kindness, deleted your mother's recipe for peppers and meat loaf.'

When Managers have a Four Seasons pizza.

'I'm saving some for leftovers tomorrow.'

"All good things must come to an end...unless I use both of my giant-size super-pots."

"You're close, but you're not the record. The record for one family in one booth—all from out of state, each ordering a complete breakfast—was set in 1978, with fifteen."

"Mum, why can't we just have a normal Sunday roast like other families?"

"Mom told me to make my vegetables disapear."

"Mother will never be able to rest on her laurels. If they're green, she'll cook them."

"Tonight, we'll be eating hot dogs with a mustard-ketchup-and-pickle purée, accompanied by peas lightly sprinkled with ketchup. Then fettuccine al dente with a ketchup sauce, followed by applesauce maison with a dollop of you know what!"

'After you with the camouflage.'

'For the last time, Megan, she won a blue ribbon at the Imperial Valley Fair... I mean, my hands are tied here.'

'Your mother spent a lot of time on this meal, so wag your tail even if you don't like it.'

"Forget George, he scarfs down everything in sight. Aunt Rose and Grandma are good for slipping us a slice. Most important, the kids are sloppy. We're bound to find some juicy scraps under their chairs. Stay alert!"

"I mean, he does have a point."

"So...that's B11, C8, F5, and A3?"

"Oh -- just scrape it off."

"Mom, Eugene picked all the peanuts off the pizza!"

'Carrot salad, carrot casserole, carrot juice, carrot cake - I want steak!'

'Well - how has everyone wasted time and energy today?'