Family Fun Navigator Pillows

The Queen of Static Electricity: 'Boring Rainy Day Sitting Area.'

'Yeah, it was wonderful to have the kids home the whole summer.'

"A GPS! Thanks guys! It's exactly what I need to guide my sleigh...you know, in light of that unfortunate hunting accident."

"Boy, that's what I call a maze."

Child driving a toy car

'I'm just using this while my monster truck is in the shop.'

'I almost get out the door and then my mom yells...'Don't you know it's February?!' And here I am again...looking like an eskimo.'

'sugar and spice my eye.'

'God, quick! Give me the gift of the gab.'

"'Parent' should always be an action verb."

"Me? I thought you were raising them."

Get ready ... Get set ...

"I like to consider Third Grade as just another life hack."

'You can always tell the pediatricians.'

"This baby will hold more than a hundred and twenty-five cubic feet of family rancor."

'I know we're not 'almost there,' but I keep asking just to keep her focused.'

Mother's Day: 2nd Sunday in May, Others Day: Every day before and after the 2nd Sunday in May.

"Will you turn that TV down? Can't you see I'm on the phone?"

"I have the kids Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. She has them Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday. Thursday they're free-range.

"No, we're not there yet because your father refuses to ask for directions!"

"It took some figuring, but I think I figured out how to handle a temperamental teenager."

'Would you like me to have a word with educational psychologist about Julie?'

"He fights me when I tell him to take a nap. When I reword it and say go reboot, he doesn't have a problem."

"And the lovely, little daughter understood her daddy was tired from harvesting people's personal data all day and went to sleep. The end."

'Well, Mr. 'Let's get him a fish they're no trouble at all,' you're on.'

"Why do they tell us not to be childish? We're only nine!"

'I've had it for the last seventeen years.'

Remote control bridge in bath.

"At least now when mom and dad fight it's quieter."

"Dad's working out car charging points if we want to visit grandad."

Do you want to go to the dance with me? Wow! I really would like to but it's too late. You have plans? No. So there isn't a problem. My parents are going to chaperone. I see the problem.

"If you're sending me home here are my mom's phone numbers plus blogs, instagram, twitter and snapchat accounts."

"Can you hold that thought until I consult my new 'Excuses For Mom' app?"

"I handled his last adventure. You take this one."

'Get real, Larry!'