Family-focused Fellow Pillows

"Another problem is that I haven't had dinner with my family for a week."

'She's a very protectice mother!' - Lifeguard at Christening/Baptism.

Balloon Kids

"Come on, we've thought of 492 names surely we can get one more"

"Anything interesting happen over the weekend, Frank?"

'Someday, Son, all this will be your ex-wife's.'

Palm Pilot. I can't wait until we get to Hawaii --- I've got lots of family there! Tropical Air.

'My mom says we're expecting a house guest for 18 years.'

"Your daughter called—you promised to play phone tag with her today."

"Please continue as a lab rat, we have five mouths to feed!"

Boss

Future Micro MGR.

HappyHouse Daycare. Family-owned & family-run since this many (fingers showing a count of seven) years.

Proud Mum.

"I've spent so much time with my family that I've started to lose sight of what really matters."

Old School Call Forwarding

"Let me tell you what it's like to be seven in this city."

"Marry you? This is so sudden, I don't know what to say!"

'These figures on parental leave are truly shocking...'

'Just a minute while your father figures this out.'

"I don’t care if your daughter gave it to you for Father’s Day, Glen – get rid of it."

It's a beautiful thing, watching your children grow into mature, responsible adults...

"Last, but not least, give my child a seat by the window so I can see her on my drone camera."

I Wooden Be Anything Without You

'Management are very keen to introduce family friendly policies...we're very keen on helping staff balance or with family commitments.'

'They're not like popsickles, Sir...They're just too warm and syrupy.'

"After I stopped telling the kids vegetables were good for them, they started eating them."

"You'll have to listen to Gramps tell you about how tough it was when he was a kid...but then he'll give you the dollar anyway!"

'Typical family rubbish bin if you ask me: No chips, no chocolate, but lots of discarded vegetables...'

'I thought I'd have one more look at the old room before I leave for college.'

'We tried solar, we tried wind, and now we have a little nuclear reactor out back.'

"Our family. We ran out of room years ago."

Interview panel - '...and what makes you the best member of my family for this job?'

Angry White Males.

"So...what do you think of babies?"