Family Finance Worriers Gifts

"OK, I'll go to my room, but one day I'll get back at you by going to college and putting you into deep financial debt."

'Change is inevitable, espeically when you have a newborn in diapers."

'Yo-you Ma will now raise our spirits and assuage our pain.'

Peter

"He doesn't fiscally stimulate me anymore."

'Why do I get the impression that my 401(k) isn't performing well.'

Wanna talk about it?

How many times do I have to tell you. . . you're broke! Broke! Broke!

"Double whammy. My weight now exceeds my credit score."

"Grandma! What big medical bills you have!"

'Having the money tree has really helped out.'

"Your assets will be frozen? Oh, boy, is it going to snow?"

"The economy doesn’t make me half as nervous as my kids do."

'I have good news and bad news. The good news is that you're going to get to relive the thrill of building your company up from nothing!'

'Climate change seems to be a real thing... in the past, our money was sufficient till the 25th of a month. Nowadays, it's melted away on the 15th.'

'You must know my kids...they spend like there's no tomorrow.'

Easy Budget Terms Are Not That Easy.

"What's your question for 'Ask Sadie'?" "My mom's in a nursing home. I think someone's stealing her jewelry." "What's the matter, you're afraid someone is stealing your inheritance?" "Simple solution: Send your mother to Japan, where their entire culture reveres the elderly." "Sayonara, grandma!!!" "Are you sure that's not just a stereotype?" "Who cares?!"

Little Investment on the Praire

'One question. Now that death's over and done with, do I still have to worry about taxes?'

'Any annuity we can afford wouldn't pay the MILK BILL!'

"All I did was ask it if we'll ever collect Social Security and Medicare."

Energy Bills

"Unfortunately, my holding on to tech-stocks was faith-based."

"Could be worse..." "Could be worse..." "Could be worse..." "Could be... oh, never mind."

"My client, whom I shall refer to as your son, has retained me to represent him in these negotiations regarding an increase in his allowance!"

"I don't know what we'll do when our adjustable-rate mortgage resets."

'It's our 10 year plan.'

'We don't have the money for everyone to go, and, well, our luggage has never been to the Bahamas before...'

"The Bank has returned the rent cheque marked 'Insufficient funds', but it doesn't say whether that's them or us!"

'It's money in the bank. . . so it's worrisome.'

"When we got married, you said we'd be in the lap of luxury...but here we are, in the butt of bankruptcy!"

'We can't afford to be middle class anymore.'

"No matter what one says, a safe remains a good way to keep your money safe."

'Well, we've been talking about downsizing, and it looks like the bank is going to make sure we do.'