Family Dinner Planner T-Shirts

Mrs. Robot attempts to improve her family's diet.

"I heard you've become a vegetarian."

"At their age, we weren't allowed to play with out food!"

'I sent out for everything.'

"See? I told you changing his food would be traumatizing."

Life with a professional baseball catcher.

'‘Because I said so' or ‘Just wait until you have kids of your own' section?'

"I'm not weird I'm a 'person of weirdness'."

'But Mom, I like potatoes in their jackets.'

'Protein, starch, vegetable??? When you said 'square meal' I thought PIZZA IN A BOX!'

'I'm worried about him, he eats his vegetables, but not his dessert!'

'You realize we're only having three people over...'

"Maybe we should have brought a Riesling."

"Oh, mournful and terrible engine of horror and crime—of agony and of death, not asparagus again!"

"Mom, does the Russian borscht you made for dinner give me foreign-policy experience?"

"Tia Carmen's not happy unless she can send people away with a plate of leftovers for the road."

"No thanks, I'm stuffed."

Kiddies Menu for Witches

"That table is yours once that party decides to move to the suburbs."

"I hope we can sell everything before it's time for mom to make dinner."

'4 Jello desserts - and, for the love of God, please make them all the same color.' (at restaurant with three kids)

The ecumenical dinner party.

"I grabbed it away from Larry and seasoned it properly just in time. It's a rescue meatloaf."

"OK, duty roster for today: Ken is to scout for entrees, Tim for mains and of course, Tina for desserts..."

Congratulations, dear! Your home cooked dinner was so good you'd think it was an expensive frozen entree!

'I hope you all like stuffing.'

'Hurry up you guys! I'm about to serve dinner!'

"It's so nice to gather and enjoy a simple home-cooked meal together."

"That sister of yours sure has some nerve asking for those leftovers - we earned them."

'As soon as your mother is through laundering the money we'll go out to eat.'

Man with a 'menu', woman with a 'womenu'.

"And that's where hot dogs come from."

"Fridge-to-table"

"This time when they show us their latest acquisition, we'll gush regardless."

"I thought we agreed that the dining room was a buffer zone."