Family Comedy Lover Gifts

Home Alone.

"Never mond how I got here. Just get your mother."

"Hot chocolate, straight. ...make it a double."

"If you like the baby pictures you should see the 'Making Of' video!"

"I told you my helicopter parents are worse than your helicopter parents."

The Family Joules: Part 1

'They want to watch the baby do lunch.'

'It's your mother -- are you here?'

"You're old enough to know now. . . he's not your real father."

"Arrrgh! I need a mask!! At best a gas mask! Arrrgh!!"

"I'm running a little late with this one."

"Couldn't you have just laughed instead of spelling 'LOL' in your alphabet soup?"

'Why can't we trade him to that lady for her two little girls?'

Suffering from Cooties?

'Thank goodness you were wrong mom, dad says a period is what comes at the end of a sentence.'

"If you insist on doing all the voices, Dad. Don't you think father bear should have a deeper voice than Goldilocks?"

Dad Trophies

Rabies on board - a couple of rabid babies.

"After I fix your laptop, can I have a bedtime story?"

"Good work Tim, you snatch it all: none of this sharing with your brother nonsense..."

'Why is it taking so long to eat your soup?'

"Good news. It wasn't a toxic chemical leak. It was an old pizza in your kid's room."

"I'll bet you're very proud of your handsome, well-behaved little sporks here."

"I told my mom either the sitter goes, or I go!"

Yes, they are all dependants."

"So kids, you got work from your teachers right?"

'Yeah, bit how does the stork get into the maternity room?'

"Okay, just one story. Once upon a time, there was a naughty little boy who wouldn't go to sleep."

"I've got something to tell you,Dad-I don't like fish...I mean I REALLY don't like fish...I HATE fish,Dad-there,I've said it now."

'Jimmie, run and tell your dad the tractor is flooded.'

'I'm going to bed...whatever...'

"But Mom, you said it was a pup tent!"

'I want you to bring me one.'

"Remember this about new babysitters - making rules and enforcing them are two different things.".

"Young man, you go march your butt right back up those stairs and don't come down until you've made yourself look presentable!"