Faithful Linguists Gifts

"No! It's lo! (as in behold) - not lol Laughing Out Loud!"

Now that we've invented language, let's talk about our relationship.

Fred interpreted the word compact as a verb, not as an adjective.

'In today's market hyperbole was up sharply. Similes and metaphors held relatively steady with euphemisms hitting another record low.'

"Carpe pizza"

"I do like you, Peter, but interfacing is a very serious step."

"We're to stop talking about 'budget cuts'. Apparently it's depressing for staff and clients..."

"Hair spray"

Monk and Bible and Devil Page Marker

The Nanuit Have 2,027 Words For Snow, But, After Awhile, They Just Talk About Something Else...

'Now that we've learned to talk, we can have FOCUS GROUPS!'

"Well that answers that question!"

'Pop-up Bible.'

Witch's spell check.

'Once a donzel, the dyvour now settled for orts.'

'I don't like this part. 'Please find enclosed the inclusion of my enclosure'.'

"Dog...God. God...dog. Cat...tac."

'Talking about Jesus is NOT name-dropping!'

Frenchman Speaking to Englishman

'Her being multi-lingual has it's drawbacks I'm afraid-she nags me in SIX languages!'

Brothers Grimm

"You don't need to sacrifice good grammar in order to talk dirty."

Simultaneous translation.

Back Down

"Spell "orange." "The fruit or the colour, Miss?"

Cut A Rug

'I think it's finally accurate to say that literally everyone is misusing the word 'literally'.'

Monks form copier service.

'I just don't get that guy. Sometimes he sits with us... sometimes he doesn't.'

'We don't seem to be doing well in the foreign beverage market. However, due to a mistranslation of our slogan we've become the leading international provider of embalming fluid.'

'Are you choking or are you serious?'

Hart Warming

'Mail' and 'Femail' mailbags.

My digital assistant device hears things in my house and then targeted ads are sent to me, but it seems like there are still some bugs in the system. I can explain it, Frank, you're always talking about golf. The device hears "tee" and get ads for "tea." When the golf pros are on TV I get ads for cars and pet shopts. That's because the device repeatedly hears "long drive" and "birdie." Then when I talk about my playing golf, I get ads for knives and fishing equipment. Of course! The devi

"Lord, if my prayers are pleasing to Thee, please confirm by fax."