Faithful Funnybone Pillows

"Welcome to tonight's panel on interfaith humour."

Phone call from heaven.

Getting Religion Back Into Christmas.

Two priests share a laugh outside a confessional booth

"We should start a church where we only read the parts of the bible that are never read in church."

'I'm told you've been born again, again and again. . . ?'

How to spot the infrequent Mass attendees.

How's my sermon. . .

"If anyone wants me, Ms. Clark, I'll be down in the youth department."

'I'm SECRET Santa, kid.'

How James and John became known as "Sons of Thunder".

Vicar wearing sunglasses.

'God does not call the qualified. He koala-fies the called.'

'What are you giving up for Lent this year?' - 'Anchovies.' - 'I thought you hated anchovies?' - 'I do. Care for a cookie instead?' - 'Lent is supposed to be about challenge and sacrifice!' - 'Play to win, Baby!'

"Your sins are forgiven, but not your co-pay."

"The amendments are coming next week!"

Vocation,vocation,vocation.

'If the Lord had wanted us to use the metric system, there would have been ten apostles!'

"...And for anyone who forgot to bring something for the collection..."

Shortly after being accepted into John's heart, Jesus lodged in aorta.

'Now that's what I call a religious broadcast.'

Jesus as a child - 'Just look at my clean floor! What have I told you about walking on puddles?'

Eucharist

'A funny thing happened to me on the way to the church tonight..'

Chruch member about preacher: 'Pastor Woodsley has old fashioned power point.'

'I just glanced back at Sodom and Gomorrah for a second...'

"A reading from the ax of the apostles."

"For Feng Shui I'd like to move your liver above your lungs.''

Holy phone

"It's the appendix to the Ten Commandments: The Ten Ultimatums."

"We learned in Sunday School about how Cain whacked Abel."

"Do I have to declare this as income to the IRS?"

Dang, another calling. This time, Avon.

Preaching from the New Western Consumerist Version of the Bible.

'Is this seat saved?' Fundamentalism Gone Awry.