Fairytale Enthusiasts Pillows

'Look, you're just going to have to cut back. Times have changed. . . Today's kids are full of hydrogenated oils, trans fats, corn syrup, and all kinds of preservatives.'

'Well, if this book doesn't send you to sleep nothing will.'

"And the prince and princess lived happily ever after."

"I was hoping you'd consider this a prelude to a kiss."

'I know I have a name to live by, but I'd rather wear sandals in summer...'

'Times are a bit tough for the Tooth Fairy, so please accept these valuable discount coupons in lieu of cash.'

'Mum, how come we're always the bad guys in bed-time stories?...'

Lanky men and chubby women work at 'Sprat Industries'.

'Frankly, Earl, if I had realized that you were a toad instead of a frog, I never would have kissed you!'

Red riding hood giving the wolf a complex

"Believe it...I am your fairy god-padrino."

Wishing Well

"Good day, young sir! Would you care to exchange your cows for some preference shares in Beanstalk Development Industries?"

'One kiss will turn me into a prince. But you won't like the stretch marks.'

'Sorry, but I don't kiss anyone with 'smoker's breath'.'

'According to the law of averages, wouldn't the glass slipper fit a lot of maidens?'

But I thought you two were living happily ever after!"

"You're just Queen of the Hop, I'm Queen of the whole shebang!"

CAUTION! Fulfillments may cause reduced long-term happiness.

"Open up, you're being LIBERATED."

Sleeping beauty wearing a face mask

"Five more minutes."

"I conjured you up a dress, shoes, a corsage, and a limo—I'm not ponying up for an afterparty too."

"Well in this case, Cynthia, it was judicious not to postpone marriage."

'Thanks for kissing me so that I turned from a frog into a prince! May I have French flies with that?'

'Great, he's going to be a bean counter.'

"Tell me more about your flatmates."

Babe in the woods!

Princess Snail Ride

'I'm surprised to see you here. You appear to have a storybook marriage.'

Snow White and the seven rehab dwarves.