Expense Sleuth Gifts

'Any other hidden operating expenses you haven't told me about?'

British savings accounts

"Wait a sec, I have a coupon around here somewhere."

'I want to claim for black marker pens.'

"So much for password protected."

'And I want that end table for $40...' When bargain hunters crack.

"Dad, wouldn't my allowance be better off earning interest in a tax free municipal bond fund?"

"And they say it's the safest 500-P/E stock out there."

IRS agent to professor scrutinizing tax return under microscope: 'Still looking for that tax loophole, professor?'

Have you seen my money?

"You never saw a tax haven. Now look into this light.

Bookkeeping Club

"I've been told to go through all our expenses...cut out any fat, get rid of any costly perks!"

'We've gone through your books and we demand payment in cash.'

The High-Tension Drama of "The Fiscal Cliff"

Wishing Well: Tax reciept available for business related wishes.

"The bank examiners are here, oh!...I see you already know."

"We're going to need the best forensic accountants money can buy."

Statistics Research: You Can Fool 45% of the People 55% of the time, but you can't fool all the people all the time.

'I won't be able to look up your account right now. Our computers have been impounded by the authorities.'

"Nice try, Mr. Willis, but it won't make any difference."

One young wife asking another if she finds it more economical to do her own cooking.

Artwork in a gallery still has wet paint.

"I'm trimming the fat around here, Bailey, and I'd like to see you lose $75 per week"

"You know my motto: Ready, aim . . . audit."

You're right, Jenkins, the numbers don't lie. Get me some that do.

'It's a bet - If I don't take this next one down, I owe you a hundred bucks.'

'Lecture on inflation, was £5, now £9.'

A measured response to the budget speech.

"About your self employed expenses, do you do anything purely for pleasure?"

P.O. Boxes. It's from the IRS --- It seems they've declared my savings account to be in the public domain.

'We believe numbers don't lie, especially when interpreted advantageously.'

"Well, you helped me with my initial health issue, but now I've got headaches from dealing with billing and insurance!"

'How come you're questioning my petrol bill?'

"I'm sorry, Mr. Holmes, but we just can't allow all these deductions."