Expense Esplanade Engineer Gifts

"Just remember, don't claim for lunch unless I was with you."

Man needs to buy excuse for missing work from vending machine.

"Your top 10 list of reasons why you didn't do your homework is creative, but not acceptable."

'Can I hand in my report tomorrow. Ms. D'Amato? I haven't finished reading the book. I've been too busy coloring it.'

'Take a letter,'

"This data shows us that we are going up to a new level."

'YOU try telling him!'

Sheep Escalator

'The homework ate my dog.'

STRIP "Looks like the escalators on the blink again"

'What's Iggy doing home from school at this time of day?'

'My expense account isn't what it used to be. So for lunch I'm taking you fishing, and we'll eat what we catch.'

"And then he said he wanted $50,000 for it."

"A scientific approach to generating excuses"

Beginner Level Escalators

"It all began with trying to measure project outcomes."

Sewage Farm, "Bloody Hell, Crap Circles."

'Our fare hike will leave service at the same level, just like guess what?'

'The brakes aren't working because of 'mechanical fatigue'...The escalator isn't working because of 'mechanical fatigue'...why don't you walk up?'

"Oh wait, we need to be on the 1-9 North bound escalator to get to the food court."

'My son wants to become an elevator engineer.'

Nice work, Fred, but this isn't a job for the Plausible Excuse Department. We've called in the big guns from our Watertight Alibi Division.

"What do you mean, I'm always lounging here doing nothing? I'm hoping!"

Inconsiderate cleaner.

"O.K., one at a time, step forward and say, 'That's it, lady - you've blocked your last escalator.' "

Favoured angels were given a special pass for the 'Lift to Heaven'

Mall Talk

Construction worker with stop signs.

'It's all set. Now help me catch my sister.'

Roller coaster company with sales chart shaped like a roller coaster.

"It was even more dangerous before the escalator."