Expedition Expert T-Shirts

"Everest summit 1 km merge left"

"Davina McCall: Life at the Extreme takes a celebrity to the most extreme places on Earth!"

"Stepping on the gown never works. They run faster without it."

'I want to visit the very EDGE of civilisation, to explore the BRUTAL shores of natures most REMOTE regions. If you could manage that with a five star hotel and first class travel it would be perfect.'

Mall Directory: You aren't here x - where the heck are you?

"Since global warming the Abominable Snowman is much less frightening than he used to be."

Travel Agency: Pacific time cures all ills.

'It's only four acres but we're glad we bought it - he's always wanted to be an expert in his own field.'

Export

'You say you've been hibernating in Alaska for the past 25 years. Do you think you can drive an SUV up the side of a mountain?'

"Sorry we’re late, but apparently the journey of 1,000 miles begins with 'I know a shortcut around this traffic'."

'We knew of your return from your round the world trip - we could smell you a mile away!'

'Yes, It's in that direction.'

'WOW! Did anyone see the recoil on this baby?'

"A textbook landing..."

US Camouflage School

"The scientists are coming back to study us, so I want you both to be on your best behaviour this time!"

You're Here. Man, You Really Look Like An Idiot!

The peak awaited, but first they had to contend with the foothills.

Solo North pole expedition - 'Bugger!'

The Everest Experience: Cafe and Gift Shop

'It would be a kindness to tell he HAS won his Duke of Edinburgh Award.'

'My phone's been tapped!'

'California: Here I come!'

One Fine Tuesday in Antarctica

'Remember he's got a short fuse.' (Chairman of an explosives company).

"How was your day, dear?"

"We'll see you soon, kids! Your mother and I have won a romantic cruise for two on some man's huge ark."

A tortoise tries to mate with an igloo.

The lesser-known, and ultimately unsuccessful, Joe Louis and Dick Clark expedition.

Explorer receiving a Valentine from a penguin.

1910: It looked like Scott would have to find his own way to the pole.

"He's a lobbyist for the defense industry."

Couples Riding an Elephant

"Oh, bugger!"