Existential Detective T-Shirts

Pinocchio's Second Realization

"You're sucking all the fun out of my misery."

"I wonder if A.I. will inevitably become as tired and depressed as we are."

"It seems my fear of death has been replaced by my fear of politics."

"They say it takes 10,000 hours to perfect something- I guess I was a bit hasty throwing that together in 144."

Mr. Metamorphosis: "At least this better than waking up as a cockroach."

"I guess I'm more of a why-wolf."

reincarnated worm...

"That's our house, that's Mommy going to work, and that's you, staring out the window, wondering where it all went wrong."

'Hamlet'

'Things have really livened up down there since You introduced SEXUAL reproduction.'

"Why bother?"

Chiller Theatre

Cats want answer to the big questions in life.

"I shop, therefore I am."

"Needs to get a life"

"Existentialist Trail. Get lost then found. Nietzsche Park System"

65 Million Years Ago

"Ever feel like even when you're barking at something you're still barking at nothing?"

A man deflates and dissolves into the ground and becomes a flower.

"Then one day, as I caught a tennis ball in midair, I asked myself, 'Is this all there is?'"

Pastorius wonders why.

"Talking to your own reflection? Even your imagination is pathetic."

"If there were really a God, trees would come with outlets and wifi hubs."

Extreme Sisyphus

Recipes from the Jean-Paul Sartre Cookbook

Optimist

"You need to justify your own existence first."

"I'm learning to live with existence."

"To paraphrase Nietzsche, there is no pleasure without pain au chocolat."

"Wait, am I hear for you or are you here for me?"

"Mrs. Marsha Mullhouse, of Kenosha, Wisconsin, asks, "Are You subject to the laws of physics, or are the laws of physics subject to You?"

Fleeting illusions of happiness hour 5-7

"Is this what I want to be doing with my death?"

"All a cat CAN do is strive for authenticity."