Existential Comedy Enthusiast T-Shirts

"I happen."

Bob encounters one of the bugs in the Jean Paul Sartre fan website.

Jean-Paul Sartre

"The following program was made possible by fluctuations in the random chaos of the Universe...."

"Hey! If you're here to marvel at the smallness of your existence within a glorious, vast and unknowable universe, there's a line!"

"Ever feel like even when you're barking at something you're still barking at nothing?"

"Some mid-life crisis that turned out to be."

'The stage hypnotist was great, he regressed Jeff to a previous life, and discovered that he was a layabout then, too.'

"Nihilistic customer service"

Business Sisyphus

Shallow End (Slightly innocuous statements) - Deep End (a little more weighty)

"I've come to stage in my life-cycle where just landing on stuff isn't good enough anymore."

'I believe there's an unseen hand behind everything we do.'

Lab studies suggest that a human growth pill is just around the corner.

Welcome to ARE YOU ALL RIGHT? Theatre

"So, tell me what happened after this Schrodinger put you in this box..."

"I think, therefore I am depressed."

Impartial Testing: "Eeny, meeny, money, moe..."

Man falls off perch

"This is a little embarrassing to admit, but everything that happens happens for no real reason."

"If, indeed, there is a reason for all this, than that's so much worse."

"But if I say I'm in denial then, by definition, I'm not in denial."

If a tree falls on a philosopher in the woods, and no one is there to hear his screams for help, did he really make a sound?

"Yes, but can your philosophical speculations on existence also be relative to why I crossed the road?"

"I thought the snow would never start"

"I've done a lot of soul searching, and I've come to the conclusion that I should be thinking less about money and more about naked women."

Virtural Dialogues: Simone DeBeauvoir & Jean-Paul Sartre.

"I'm sorry, Mister Mulligan is dead. . . would you care to wait?"

Last Real Tough-Minded Thinking for 200 Miles

'Existential truckstop'

'The meaning of life? 'Life' boils down into three categories...you are born...you live awhile....you then die.'

'Death in the 'life' section of library'

"Do you think he'll bring treats?"