Exclamation Fan Pillows

"Mom!! School was fun!!! We learned all about exclamation points!!!!"

"This is a great spot to practice mighty roars son..."

"All our extras are ex-soccer players - they're the best at dramatically faking injuries."

Two vending machines for fisherman: 'Live Bait' next to 'Dead as a Doornail Bait'

"Feel better, dear?"

"He wasn't even early - he was on his way home from a party!"

'Do you always have to shout? Well? Do you? Huh?'

The missiles had failed...so it was down to Frank...and plan B.

SWAT Team (going in to catch a fly).

'You fancy yourself as a press baron, don't you?'

Pun on Excalibur - Swiss Army knife appears from the lake.

Did you hear? Marco Polo went to China in search of herbs and spices. Wow! The first instance of thyme travel!

"I'm taking a creative writing class. I turned in my checkbook and got an A."

"The people will not tolerate people speaking on behalf of the people any longer!"

Phill Jupitus

"This one is very popular one. Ben Bernanke repeating over and over, 'the economy is going to be okay'."

Well, no wonder the natives are restless. They're worshipping an espresso machine!

"My guess is that you're not the first European here.

The Sports Fanatic

"Now it's high definition!"

Tone Deaf and Can't Read Music - Please Give.

Thelonious Monk

Memorable Jam Sessions: the night Charlie Parker asked Spike Jones to sit in on Ah-Ooogah horn."

"Charles, would you be my vintner?"

'Don't rush me! I need some time to process everything.'

Communication on a bus

I'm "Oog," this is "Wonk" and the guy drawing on the wall behind you in "Blog."

Only a handful of people are this small.

"Why didn't Lewis and Clark just use GPS?"

'Hmm, your luggage seems to have been booked through to India.'

Used car salesman to man: 'And this one was driven by a little old lady ...er ...uh ... with 36 grandchildren.'

This is the Ask Sadie Show. You're on, caller. What's your problem? I'm - Don't pussyfoot around the issue. Get to the point! I don't have all day! Get on with it, already! Next caller. You're on. What's your problem? Um

""Forget that 'Age Before Beauty' stuff. I want to stay behind you to keep an eye on you!"

He was beginning to quiver all over like Lionel Barrymore.

"Wow...tough crowd."