Excavator Operator Gifts

'Yeah, I tried 'Open Sesame' ... then I just went at it with a backhoe.'

F&E Excavation. "We're in over our heads." I don't know about that slogan, Ernie.

'He really wanted to get into the zombie role, so he became a Meth-Head actor.'

In/Out/These Things Happen.

"Behold! As I transform this family size frozen lasagna into a meal for one."

'Why couldn't you just give him a bucket and shovel?'

If nobody had invented graphics

Working in the Hazard Zone!

"All our extras are ex-soccer players - they're the best at dramatically faking injuries."

Crane operator Jimmy Morrison liked to break in new guys by giving them what he called a 'sky wedgie.'

"Here's the deal, boys. We need to see a little more bickering. We're doing a Reality Show."

'Action!...Cut!...Right, everything else is CGI'

Local News in Heaven

'We're doing a fly on the wall documentary.'

"Yeah, that's right. I'm the sandman. Where did you think I was getting my sand all these years?"

Husband bakes a pie

Police film evidence

“Look! We’re on the naked cam!”

'Business is booming.' - at Uncle Bert's Explosives

"... And in Canada today ... nothing happened."

Crane fishing

'He was a barman before he got into the demolition game.'

'What do you think of the new Mars Mover I just ordered from The Whole Mars Catalogue?'

'Well, they're just like your mom's cookies if your mom is a 35 ton, multi-unit dough extruder.'

"In this scene, imagine you're sentient and know what feelings are."

'I found another pothole.'

A fly on the wall documentary.

'I thought this was supposed to be clean fill dirt!'

"In a late breaking news story, our TV station is on fire."

A convict escaping during the press scrum

'You don't know how much it would mean to me if you could just jump.'

"I started out with a molehill, then I just kept going."

"It's my extreme sports camera. I thought it would be cool to show my mom what I do at work."

The Making of a Gag Cartoon

August 9, 1857: The World's First Elevator Demonstration