Exam Season Gifts

'My reading comprehension is so-so, but I do make up for it with my highlighting skills.'

'I really crammed last night.'

'They've all tested positive for stress.'

'I've gotten over my fear of tests, but now I seem to have developed studying anxiety.'

Gretchen encounters the mother of all SAT questions.

Biology Revision - Arse / elbow.

Four Types of Test-Takers...

'The good news is that you don't have any long-term memory loss. The bad news is it's all MIDTERM memory loss.'

'This would be a lot easier, Ms. Sims, if there were a little more margin for error.'

"I had all the right answers, but I had them in the wrong order."

Burning the midnight oil.

'It's not his fault Miss! He's been awake all night worrying about the exam!'

'Relax. This is only a test.'

"I don't get it. If it's an aptitude test, why didn't they let me use my apps?"

Waiting for the results.

'A rose by any other name means I flunked the botany test.'

Citations Needed!

'An actual History lesson is set for June...'

"Turn off your cell phones and your GPS's."

'Wilkins! Keep your eyes on your own cadaver!'

Cliff Notes

'I wish you wouldn't keep saying 'It's all starting to add up'!'

'I ace 'wheeling' but I flunked 'dealing'' - Boy on leaving Business Administration.

'Think she'll give any points for Herculean effort?'

School boy uses 'Sats Nav' to navigate his way to exam room.

"Don't you have a big test tomorrow?"

'Captain Cook made six voyages and was killed in one of them. Which one was it?'

"If you hadn't given me such a bad grade on the last test, I wouldn't be so stressed out about this one!"

'I've just failed an important essay. Maybe it was a mistake to text it to my english teacher.'

'I'm calling my one remaining 'life line'.'

"If what you don't know can't hurt you, I'm safe from math, English, history, and science."

"I'm failing 16th century British History, so now I have to get a Tudor."

'I have to cram for a paleontology exam tonight.'

"Shouldn't you be studying?

'Final exams are easier if you think of them as exit polls.'