Espionage Professionals T-Shirts

'Don't tell anybody, but I have a date tonight with a rogue agent.'

The Anti-Agent

"Bond James, Bond."

Barks in code.

'To most people, 1984 is just a novel; around here it's our instruction manual.'

"I'll have the Investigator's Special."

HDQTRS division, Motor Pool and Covert Ops.

'We subpoenaed all of 'Mr. Big's' electronic messages. They're in morse code.'

Statue of Liberty with satellite dish and laptop spying on the World.

"Either we spend millions on new technology to erase each agent's memory following a sensitive assignment, or we just start hiring people over fifty."

"Check the setting. I'm sure the CIA isn't hacking into our appliances just to burn your toast."

Giant pandas doing surveillance in a zoo.

"OK, we may not have ways of making you talk, but we do have ways of making your leg twitch uncontrollably."

'More government surveillance!'

'We're looking for somebody to work on our new top secret project. Can you tell me what kind of experience you have?'

"Ok, I found a secure line."

Do you have a phone with recording capabilities? I want to be able to carry a wire when I meet with my boss.

"I started my career as an industrial spy-here."

'I don't have any formal training, but I do own the complet boxed set of 'Get Smart' DVD's.'

CIA, 'Confound it, Ruggles -- we're SUPPOSED to be worrywarts'

'I can't read their smoke signal. It's encrypted.'

The lion statues in front of New York City Library are replaced with spies.

"Screw this—I'm going to work for the tabloids."

'Is that a suspicious package in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?'

"Our intelligencia said we will be outnumbered 100 to one, but that we can hope it's only fake news."

'I'm counter - intelligence'

"I've dabbled in espionage, but my main area of expertise is self-sabotage."

"With the fortune we have spent in technology, informers and spies around the world, how is it possible that you still haven't found where the heck is Wally?"

A kid squirting gunk from an umbrella.

CCTV in church.

"What you find 'boring' spies from all over the world would find extremely interesting."

'Somebody close the window. Those pesky drones are getting in.'

"Hacking and eavesdropping are my top skills. I guess you could say I'm a good listener."