Equal Opportunity Disciplinarians Gifts

'We punish them equally, Marge, but we favor the boy.'

'I'd also like to welcome Henderson here, who joins us through Equal Opportunities for the undead.'

Statue of Female Executive

"We don't pay you less because you're a woman.. we pay you less because we're men!"

"People are always banging on about the advantages of 'so-called' diversity."

'Hi love, I've just come to clean your glass ceiling.'

Lane restricted to cars with three or more persons at least one of whom is a woman or visible minority.

Women Possibilities

'I need to find you a company with strong anti-discrimination policies...'

Sweet Girl Graduates

I'm reporting you for discriminating against tall people!

"We're looking for someone just like you but with testicles."

Equal opportunities inspector "I hear he got his job because he knew someone"

We are an equal opportunities employer - It's true. They pay the same lousy wages to men and women.

"My Dear Lady, what a perfectly charming idea! I wonder which of us gentlemen put it into your attractive little head."

'I know you're committed to hiring the handicapped, but a Press Secretary with Tourette's?'

'Do I have to enter a plea?'

"I pay Hodges like a woman, so it's only natural that I pay you less."

'We believe in seeing ability, not disability. In your case, we see neither.'

"Your application is excellent, but I'm afraid you suffer from not being enough like everyone else."

'The law requires me to tell you that we don't discriminate, gramps.'

"Of course we employ the disabled. Halve the staff here are not able to get to work on time, the rest are not able to focus on the job."

'No, the woman of the house is at work. May I help you?'

'Yes, does the work of two me...or one woman.'

Different Stories

Banned words

"And what exactly makes you think you'd be a good fit for our firm."

'Diversity is good, pass it down.'

'We need to get an equal pay expert in...'

"It drives me MAD when people complain about the lack of DIVERSITY in our recruitment."

Moses looks for a real job.

'On second thoughts I'm sure you'd make an excellent store detective, Mr Hodgson.'

'The bride's here - we're waiting for the lady vicar!'

'Aren't I entitled to a public defender?'

'Boss, I feel discriminated against. My department manager gropes every female colleague except me!'