Envoys Gifts

"Our guest for the ceasefire meeting has arrived!"

"No, it wasn't a sinkhole. Your old TV was so heavy the ground could no longer take the weight."

'I'd say he's 10 percent 'pet' and 90 percent 'Lord and Master of All He Surveys'.'

"So, the Scharfs have an atoll. Big deal."

"Are we going for suntan, personal development or being the envy of our friends on Instagram?"

When Engineers Crack.

'It was great. I hated it.'

"Didn't you just say that?"

'Your 'marriage' invention sounds good, but what if it leads to a concentration of power for the central government?'

"You're right -- this town is big enough for the both of us."

'Promise me you'll say Yes / No / Don't know ...'

Explorer with enormous magnifying glass.

"Bob wait, let's do the survey first! Sir, on a scale of 1, poor, to 10, excellent, how would you rate our chase today?"

'Can you spare a minute, madam - I'm doing a king of all I survey.'

"This is a duet yourself project."

Oh yeah! It does echo when you moo very loudly!

"That's it - I've had it up to here with measurement devices."

'Don't worry. The first 30 years of being an inspector are the hardest.'

"Gesundheit!"

"A survey found 82% of people think surveys are a waste of time."

'5.40pm on the 2nd day....and still waiting for the surveyor'

"I see you have experience marking territory."

'That seating section is for video gamers only.'

"Oh dear! Low-cost housing."

Echo in the hippo.

Vacancy at the Ecuadoran Embassy

'I wonder if you would like to subscribe to a theory.'

"Hi...Marvin Ramage - composer/ arranger/ musician author and rich."

Diplomats in the form of doormats

Julian Assange

'So how did Hakeem take it when you told him we'd be paying him in footwear instead of cash this year, for being our spokesman?'

Man with head in ground: 'I'm not burying my head in the sand, I'm doing the coal mining search myself.'

"Yes, Mr. Willis, it's definitely rising damp."

"I decided to go on land after I got the sneaker deal."