Environmental Manager Gifts

"We're a 'green' company. We only hire people with self-sustaining renewable energy."

A man works at a desk of the Hicksville Waste Mgnt. Center - His boxes are marked Sludge In Sludge Out

Purvison heads our environmentally-conscious growth fund

Tony Hayward walks the plank.

Energy performance certificate nailed to wall exhausts employer.

Foresters, Farmers and Miners! Meet your local County Extinction Agent.

Wildlife Management.

'The boss wants to hear your grips. Around here the squeaky wheel gets the organic, 0 trans-fat, soy-based lubricant.'

'Sir, we've just received word that our company is not longer a threat to the environment, and you have a squirrel holding on line two.'

"He's the head of our company's energy conservation department."

"He's in charge of our environmental policies."

I've always wanted to quit while I was ahead but the opportunity never presented itself.

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

No, I didn't know they were going to cut the office furniture budget in half.

The Jeopardy of Progress

Whats ticking away in YOUR filing system?

A paperwork machine spews endless paperwork

'We invest so much money in training staff...it's a mystery to me why businesses would risk losing them.'

On his desk, a cat has an in box, out box and litter box.

Late Stage Capitalism and the Biosphere Engage in Some Meaningful Dialogue...

IN box...OUT is wastepaper basket on fire.

"Peter's Joint Head of Communications."

"Boy, am I glad they finally hired more staff!"

What are you giving Mother Earth this year?

'I'm glad you guys could work this out in a reasonable manner.'

'When I grow up, I want to be a hydraulic engineer...'

'What motivated you to become a environmentalist?'

Man to realtor: 'How much for a starter cubicle?'

Businessman on stilts: 'I had to step over a lot of people to get where I am today.'

(oil - petroleum - gushing out of inkwell)

The Solar System (after deregulation)

Humans...What is their purpose?

THE PIED PIPER OF GRAMERCY PARK

Deforestation.

The Audacity of Fake Environmental Hope