Entourage Manager T-Shirts

'My entourage can lick your entourage!'

'He really wanted to get into the zombie role, so he became a Meth-Head actor.'

'We've financed three more startups for no fathomable reason.'

'No, your guess isn't as good as mine.'

"Welcome to Off-Off-Off Broadway."

"Well, that's the only song we know, so we can play it another two or three times, or we can cut our losses. Waddya say, Cleveland?"

"They've remained remarkably faithful to the text."

'Look - a starfish, its manager, its agent, its minders, its significant other, its make-up artist, its personal trainer, its secretary, its astrologer, its feng shui consultant...'

Owing to a clerical error, Luciano Pavarotti receives kudus instead of kudos for his performance as the Duke of Mantua.

Theatre Masks and Butts

"Same story every morning - 'Can you come and fix our windmill?'..."

"Remember, money is only a tool - to make more money."

"Toi Toi Toi!"

"Just when you're about to lose faith in humanity, you see Shakespeare in the Park."

'I know my resume makes me seem overtrained, but I really wasn't paying attention.'

In, out, shake it all about.

Jack-a-box in the theatre.

"I'm glad they want comedy... the budget is a joke."

"Well, if you hadn't misfiled it in the first place it wouldn't have been lost."

'@#$=%!} paparazzi!'

"A glimpse into a cartoon character's dressing room..."

'Dude, touring with a punk rock band was fun, but what I'd really like to do is be CEO of a fortune 500 company.'

I Pagliacci

Broadway Moosical.

'Theaters from Hell' 'We have no sound engineers, so no there's not a good seat in the house.'

'David when we said we would like you to be a role model for us. . .'

"Hello. I'm director Bob ('Blue Fires') Munsey and this is screenwriter Doris ('Highway to Nowhere') Winslow."

"Dad, why do they tell actors to "break a leg?""

"You can't beat the smell of the greasepaint..."

Cleaner cleaning under the feet of the dancers as they perform

'Get me public relations!'

Celebrity Phrenologist.

Performance In The Bedroom

'People are staring at us because they've never seen private box seats at an off broadway theatre before.'