Enthusiastic Colleague Gifts

Team of happy men and women in an 'A Team' van

"Have I complimented you on marketing's renewed team spirit?"

Men find this shampoo irresistible. It's called 'Gee, Your Hair Smells Like A New Car'.

'Senior management wanted me to raise morale so I made Lionel from accounts 'office jester'!'

'Yes! The momentum's going to shift now. Our home fan is starting to make some noise!'

'Stop saying 'how high?' until I say 'jump'.'

'You'll enjoy our staff meetings. We always begin and end with the product.'

'Thank God it's Friday', thought the watercooler.

"Hank brings five years of top sales experience to our team so lets try to make him feel welcome as he makes you all look bad."

To determine which department would be awarded the Billings contract, employees agreed to play a best-of-five dodgeball tournament.

'Ms. Hatton, take a letter, a number and a hike...'

Bureau of the Damned

Find out that man's name and give him a rise.

"Look at them smiling. They've reached their comfort zone."

'It's from my staff...make sure it's not carnivorous.'

'Where's your costume and team spirit? You're not paid to enjoy yourself - you should enjoy your work!'

"You can't expect to get anywhere in business without making an enemy or two, Filmeyer."

'You don't mind distractions as much as me, so I didn't think you'd mind if my kids played in your office today.'

"It would help if you brown-nosed a little more."

"Haaaaah. . . . Back to the office. Better put on my happy face. . ."

"I need for you to go to bat for me again, Tim. And this time, could you do it without adjusting yourself?"

"You go the extra mile for us, but in the wrong direction."

'I didn't spend $49.95 on this answering machine to have you just hang up so leave a message!'

"Every time he elbow bumps me, he hits my funny bone on purpose."

'All right, who's been sitting on the copier again?'

"Today we welcome a new VP of Irrational Exuberance."

Health and safety nightmare.

"Wider."

Jay Walking

'If his old company was so great, why didn't he just stay there?'

'I play well with others.'

"Sorry, Hogg is no longer with the firm."

110% Job Performance.

Team Spirit

'OK, it moved a little, but I can't do this all on my own. Teamwork, people. We all need to bounce at the same time.'