Entertaining Expert Gifts

"Thanks to the Oscars, we're going to be the hottest finger food this season."

"For the next Christmas party pot luck, let's skip the finger foods."

'It may be a waiter's friend, but it certainly isn't yours.'

Come dine with me!

"This is a lovely old song that tells of a young woman who leaves her cottage, and goes off to work. She arrives at her destination, and places some solid NHHS in a flask containing 0.50 atm ofammonia, and attempts to determine the pressures of ammonia and hydrogen sulide when equilibrium is reached."

Tartine

Come dine with me!

Showbiz Awards

Zombie standup

'Have you tried our home-made wine?'

"Here's another one written in E minor and in case you haven't guessed by now, it's the only chord I know."

"I'm sorry, Your Majesty. It's always my intention to leave you laughing."

Cocktails on the verandah.

"Behold! As I transform this family size frozen lasagna into a meal for one."

"If I might be serious for a moment..."

The wonderful world of cheese.

Unforgettable, that's what you are... Gnat King Cole

Party of two? No, it was quite a large party.

Clown teaches how to speak Jibberish

Clown on bike.

'How are the ventriloquist lessons going?'

'Just how big of a tailgate party are you expecting to have?'

Dinner at the Trapdoors

"We're following Carrot Top."

"Hi there! - I'm the world's first eco-friendly comedian... All My Jokes Are Recycled...!"

'We like the occasional drink on the patio.'

"Extreme miming"

The Rooster Comedian.

"Oh, boy, hard-core sugar!"

"I wrote this next song about my cat. It's called 'Please stop rubbing your face against my computer screen when I'm trying to watch Narcos.'"

Comedy Cafe

'They all laughed when I told them that I was going to marry a magician.'

'A little piece of advice, Verl. . . cut your sandwich loaf on a diagonal . . . that way people will think they're gettin' more.'

Cow Show Tunes

Join me in a Martini?