Enjoys Witty Cartoons T-Shirts

'Actually the only drawback to the place is the proximity to the prison.'

Carpool lane (a car driving into a long pool).

'It's a bill collector!'

"He calls himself orange roughy, but I remember when his name was slimehead."

'He thinks he's the cat's meow ever since he was made department head.'

New chess piece: Cat - It can go wherever it wants, or not go anywhere at all.

"You must be the demolition team."

Golfer in a tree.

Need to know basis

Play dead. We have to make them think their new sprays work.

Eskimos Rowing Out to Igloo

'We've talked it over, and we've decided to hold you for observation.'

'However, the jurors unanimously agreed that Blogojevich is the politician with the best hair!'

"Mind if I have the guys over to watch some poker?"

Gravedigger

'Do you have a reservation?'

'Don't use the sauce-it's insulting to the chef.'

"Incorrect postage, wrong zip code...it's your type we encourage to use email!"

"My emotional support dog ate my comfort food."

"I mean, have you tried not being an Elephant?"

Sleeping Fish.

"I have no problem with reality. It's just the occasional intrusion of gritty realism that I hate."

'You didn't chew, did you ?!'

'You must be the one interested in the job as a temp?'

'Between you and me, I'd rather be me.'

'Don't mind Jacob. He was raised by dogs and is just committing you to memory.'

"You should know better, Malloy... If I gave you a raise it would jeopardize the whole economy!"

Bird Feeder Restaurant

'Snake eyes or no snake eyes, the tall, skinny guy at the end of the table wins again.'

'Can't you take 'em down the recycle centre like everybody else?'

Welcome to Hell.

"He was riding his motorcycle with his mouth open! Let's just say it was an unpleasant experience for both of us..."

'Oh, come on! you know I can't read.'