English Literature Gifts

'I'd like to change my major from electrical engineering to English or something.'

'Misspell, M-I-S-P-P-E-L-L, misspell.'

'The tip off was your reference to Gregory Peck's obsession with the Great White Whale.'

Non-Creative Writing, Also Known as Plagiarism 101.

'Heathcliff! Oh, Heathcliff!'

'At a guess I'd say there were Santa's little helpers.'

The Origin Of Cliff's Notes

"I wonder what odds you would have got for that happening?"

'Oooh. By Emily Bronte. A very controversial book...Cruelty! Passion! Death! Risky territory for a woman author in the 1800s.'

'One advantage of living through the plagues and wars of the 14th century was that you didn't have to study Chaucer.'

Markets and Marketabilityby Jane Austen

'You know what this is Carruthers, don't you - a split infinitive!'

Alexander Pope

'This Dickens, does it have side effects?'

"The English language is a movable feast... some people dine on it... some just take bites."

Ben Jonson.

And after you finish studying for the Shakespeare exam, you can experience the tide in the affairs of men by taking a bath.

Charles Dickens

"You know what, 'Pride and Prejudice' is not at all what I was expecting, but I love it. . ."

"How many times must I tell you not to speak metaphorically?"

"Nothing much. Reading a book by some dead white female."

T. S. Eliot

John Donne

Samuel Taylor Coleridge

'Turns out the Yahoos didn't invent the search engine.'

'Well, we did our bit in the never-ending battle against illiteracy.'

Kelly was the first to do Shakespeare in the park.

E M Forster

"When we have interactive books, the first thing I'm going to do is rush Little Nell to a hospital."

"Oh, this old thing?"

"1984 by George Orwell. Project 2025. Presidential transition project."

"To torture an insect or not to torture an insect, that is the question."

'I remember when you used to look for answers using your astute powers of deduction.'

"That's the guy I hired to read Proust for me."

Blue Stockings - Woman revealing herself as author