End Of Semester Pillows

"Dad, the dean has gone over your financial statement, and he doesn't think you're working up to your full potential."

'I didn't write the book report. I downloaded and printed it directly from the Internet, but I did collate and staple it myself.'

Academic Idol - 'Professor Johannsen's paper was zippy. It had robust vocabulary and I almost felt that I could dance to it. I would give it a 7.'

'Today: The collective unconscious...'

'This test doesn't understand me.'

'No, copyright does not mean you have the right to copy it.'

'Shall we talk about your unacceptable behavior or shall we go directly to the penalty phase?'

Four Types of Test-Takers...

"I'm thinking that now is a good time to start those tutoring sessions."

"I had all the right answers, but I had them in the wrong order."

"And before leaving virtual class today be sure and hit that like button!"

'I don't know whether these are good grades or not. The teacher calls them unique.'

"I figured out how to raise my grades."

Spring To Do List: Teach, Testing, Testing,Test Some More. . .

"At this school we stress critical thinking. And right now I'm very critical of your thinking."

"Unfortunately, what you downloaded from the net is a ten-year-old paper I once wrote for my college boyfriend!"

'To cheat or not to cheat that is the question!'

'No I don't have scissors you can borrow.'

'Yes, that person there...'

Student - Haven't emailed in 2 days.

Aerodynamics Lecture room.

'The first exam was easy as ABC, but that one felt more like a D,E or F.'

Student wants to be excused...for the semester.

Do your research!

'A computer virus ate my homework.'

"How'd I do on the test?"

'Does it matter what answer I put down? After all, this is Liberal Arts.'

Grim Reapers sitting their 'Finals'.

Computer Room.

"How'd you do on your test?"

"So how's that math grade looking? What's the team GPA this year?"

Procrastinator Foumdation: 'We're putting off the decision to fund you for at least another month...'

'I ace 'wheeling' but I flunked 'dealing'' - Boy on leaving Business Administration.

"Academic freedom doesn't mean you're free not to study."

We pride ourselves on having every type of insurance policy, but report card insurance is a new one to us.