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"Termite spray, stat!"

A female patient in an exam room sees a sign that reads, 'Break glass in case of physician burnout'

Dear, could you please pick up some batteries? The ones in the remote are dead and I feel like I'm Amish.

"Think we'll still make happy hour?"

'We will be 3 minutes late taking off. . . the pilot has to piddle.'

Gracie's baby toys.

'Sir, will that be business or first class?'

"Well, at least we know she died peacefully."

'If we have only fractional ownership, it's not a private jet anymore, is it?'

A private jet takes off

"Sorry for the wait. Have you guys been here long?"

"If your luggage is in your clothes it doesn't count!"

'So much for your theory that mixing two 50-point-rated wines equals one rated 100.'

"Now boarding group 50 and up."

Backlash industries: makers of the macro-chip, bigger, slower..and it even makes mistakes

'A few years ago all we needed were some people who could hammer and some people who could paint.'

Before the development of the microchip, attempts to build a laptop computer were largely unsuccessful.

'Jeff is a tackle on his online college football team.'

Teddy bear being taken to hospital.

Airport Bored Rooms

Internet Cafe.

Bad times to sneeze

'Bye dear! I'll have another nice reindeer steak ready for you when you get back.'

Don't worry, the first 30 years as a paramedic are the hardest.

In case of overcrowding in the ER break glass.

'We like to spend 51 weeks of the year at our Florida holiday home...'

"Well, here's your problem. You need an O right there."

"Lucky Guess."

'But, I have only one item of hand-luggage... You can't charge me extra...'

"Let me through – I'm morbidly curious!"

Man hitting a TV and going out of focus himself.

Resusci Annie takes a well-earned vacation.

"Could you pass me up? I'm in row one."

"We are now in 'The Galley,' where flight attendants scavenge for food, hoard magazines, hide from passengers and over share details of their personal lives."

Lithium Fair