Emotion Detective T-Shirts

"Unfortunately, at this age I express glee and stark raving terror in the exact same way."

Lousy parents... inadequate husband... sad little doggie...

"I'm not happy."

"Did you do that to be hurtful?"

"I dunno, I guess I just don't believe in myself anymore."

Woman and pets with hair sticking straight up all enter Stress Management Clinic.

"I know it’s an issue, and we’re working on it in therapy."

"I met him on an online dating site. He was on their 'return' section."

(When I'm good I'm very very good, but when I'm bad I'm... Well….) (Horrid?)

Relationship Warning Lights

"The Langmore Regional High School Inner Debate Team"

"No, I really DO love you. It's just that my committee has some issues."

"I've switched my energy provider, and I switched my broadband provider. Now I want to switch my misery provider."

"Is this Randy the Love Doctor?"

"If you let down your guard, I'll walk over the moat."

Large Emoticon Collider

"I scream! You scream! I can't stop the screaming!"

'Sometimes it's difficult to get their feelings to the surface.'

Comedy and tragedy masks

"The day at school? Oh, you know, the usual psychological and educational stew."

The Map of the Human Heart

'Am I looking sad or happy in the appropriate places?'

"Just what emotion is your emotional support dog supporting?"

"Your feelings may be artificial, but that doesn't mean they're not real."

"I appreciate the support. It feels good to finally get that off my chest."

"There's something I have to tell you."

"Want to deal with some unresolved issues or just get another movie."

Tragedy/Schadenfreude

"I feel like I don’t even know my own husband ... and it’s driving me wild!"

"My inner child wants to have a playdate with your inner child."

"Feel better, dear?"

"...and those are my deepest, most intimate feelings about our friendship."

"I don’t know how many ways I can explain it. One morning you’ll just wake up and know that you’re in love."

Thin Tank and Emote Tank.

Classic Emojis for sale.