Emotion Detective Gifts

"Unfortunately, at this age I express glee and stark raving terror in the exact same way."

Lousy parents... inadequate husband... sad little doggie...

"I'm not happy."

"Did you do that to be hurtful?"

Psychiatry. Don't worry. I've treated much worse inferiority complexes than yours!

"I dunno, I guess I just don't believe in myself anymore."

Woman and pets with hair sticking straight up all enter Stress Management Clinic.

"I know it’s an issue, and we’re working on it in therapy."

"I met him on an online dating site. He was on their 'return' section."

(When I'm good I'm very very good, but when I'm bad I'm... Well….) (Horrid?)

Relationship Warning Lights

University Soapflakes

"The Langmore Regional High School Inner Debate Team"

"No, I really DO love you. It's just that my committee has some issues."

"I scream! You scream! I can't stop the screaming!"

"Is this Randy the Love Doctor?"

"If you let down your guard, I'll walk over the moat."

"I've switched my energy provider, and I switched my broadband provider. Now I want to switch my misery provider."

Large Emoticon Collider

'Sometimes it's difficult to get their feelings to the surface.'

"The day at school? Oh, you know, the usual psychological and educational stew."

Comedy and tragedy masks

The Map of the Human Heart

'Am I looking sad or happy in the appropriate places?'

'I'm sick and tired of your mood swings, Frank!'

"Just what emotion is your emotional support dog supporting?"

"Your feelings may be artificial, but that doesn't mean they're not real."

"I appreciate the support. It feels good to finally get that off my chest."

"There's something I have to tell you."

"Feel better, dear?"

"My inner child wants to have a playdate with your inner child."

"...and those are my deepest, most intimate feelings about our friendship."

"I don’t know how many ways I can explain it. One morning you’ll just wake up and know that you’re in love."

Two Rages Passing in the Night

"Want to deal with some unresolved issues or just get another movie."