Embarrassment Avoider T-Shirts

"It's sundown. Where is he? Did I tell him sundown or sunrise? I said sunrise...I must look ridiculous."

'Don't be so paranoid. We're not gossiping about what happened to you yesterday ... at 11:43 am.'

"How embarrassing. Please, just leave me home next time you go to the Laundromat."

'Thanks for the invitation, but I can never seem to find the energy to party...'

"I could have been a big celebrity but for my fear of public speaking."

Nervous at a party.

'So glad we ticked the no publicity box.'

"Baldo, we need to talk."

"I dooon't know this sooonngg. I'm just heeeere with my daaaaaughter and her frieeeends."

"Singing makes me self-conscious."

Chatty, garlic-coffee breath, apathetic, contagious

Snoozed when I should have schmoozed.

"What an awful morning. I left home without my phone."

Chip and Fran Cooper: The Most Embarrassing Parents in the World.

"Regarding earnings guidance, as my mother used to say: 'If you can't say something nice, don't say anything'. I'll be shutting up now."

"Just this once, can we not talk about news or politics or money or family or relationships or children or friends or sex or religion or sports or culture or real estate or the past or the future?"

I've got to run to my job interview! Do I have spinach between my teeth?

"I invited a few friends over. Don’t worry – you can still be miserable."

Herman likes to stay in his comfort zone.

'Please excuse my mother, this is my first interview.'

"Patient. . . seems. . . reluctant. . . to get his. . . prostate. . . checked. . ."

'Play among yourselves while I deal with my stage fright.'

"I didn't mind the panel interview, but I got creeped out by the group hug at the end."

'Been coming here for years and never bumped into anyone who knows me . . . weird!'

"We came early to avoid the conga line."

Not in the mood for human interaction line

'I roll over and play dead when I don't want to see someone.'

"It's just if the TV isn't on I never know where to look."

'If the ECG isn't broken then we have problem'

"You just watch him Ethel. He'll sit there and say nothing, just to annoy me."

"Oh, no! People are coming to sit near us! Put up the banner!"

Stuck in the Conversation Pit of Hell.

"Public display of rejection"

"I wouldn't say you embarrassed yourself. It was more like social self-immolation."

"So they wanted the bathroom?"