Email Procrastinator Pillows

"Oh no, I never replied to Theresa's email! And tomorrow I must call Steve.... What does Yara think of me?"

"If you're smart enough to design a robot to do your homework, then you're certainly smart enough to just do your homework."

"Ideas that jump from noggin when head not yet screwed on."

"Lazy? I've been social-networking my ass off."

"I'd rather eat your homework."

"Honey, I can't go to the gym today. I feel too out-of-shape."

"I flunked out of cooking school. Even the dog won't eat my homework."

"I did my report on time travel, but my dog ate my homework in the future."

'I'm just going to go and slip into something more comfortable, like denial.'

Man needs to buy excuse for missing work from vending machine.

"Sorry, my report is blank. I just stayed home, watched tv and played video games during vacation."

Serious Putty

'1001 things to do whilst waiting to get on the internet.'

"Josh, can you call my 3:30 and let them know I'll be a little late and completely unfocused."

"I tried the C25k but prefer the 5k2C"

E-waste - 'Well there's another hour gone on email.'

'I forgot to do my homework so can we plow into a snow bank on the way to school?'

'I prefer to work vicariously as opposed to remotely.'

"I can't mow the lawn today. A bug just flew up my nose."

Studying and technology

"Things to do today: 1) stare out window 2) crap on new bedspread 3) stare out window 4) claw up ottoman 5) stare out window 6) take nap."

Working from home to-do list.

Nethead strip: Over doing the time spent on the computer

Obedience school was tough. Especially the homework, which he would do and then eat.

Waiting to do the second coat was the worst part. It was like watching paint dry.

Al, The Go-From Guy

Easy chair exercise machines

"My five least favorite words in the world: By End of the Day Friday!"

The meeting will start a little late, intelligence is lost in the building somewhere.

'Work's the greatest thing on earth... so I'm saving some up for tomorrow!'

"You don't get a lot of work done, Jenkins, but I admire how thoroughly unstressed you are."

"I hate going into a staff meeting without a clear exit strategy."

Invaders from Planet Manava.