Email Escape Artist Gifts

'A computer virus infected my work e-mails. Now they are all sent to the junk folder and are automatically deleted. I have never had so much free time.'

"I'm thinking your email must have gotten directed into my 'Oh no, that guy again' folder."

Man in office says to colleague: 'There's so much communication by email now. It's rather :-( '

The Great Pyramid of Paperwork

"Another company thinks I might like to keep receiving their emails!"

Email Notifications

"I'd like a week off without any business related e-mail on my home computer."

"Clear my schedule for the next five minutes. I feel the need for some spontaneous frivolity."

'Where would you recommend for a tech-free experience.'

"Ooooh, I bet that feels nice."

"Me, as soon as I'm old enough, I'm out of here! I'll go and join my older brother: he's a beach bum in San Diego, California..."

"My husband is taking me on a cruise, so I’m looking for a book that will help me forget that I’m on a cruise with my husband."

'We'd just like to get away from all leading economic indicators for a while.'

"I don't see a destination called 'Veganville' sir."

'What do you mean, you're tired of the rat race?'

"Just heading out for a good cry, care to join me?"

"This is our most difficult escape room. In here, you're a mother of 4 unruly children, tons of overdue bills and a lazy husband."

'The the President we've gone surfin', surfin' U,S,A,'

"It's wonderful to be away from the rat race. So, what happened on 'CSI: Miami' last night?"

"You had the power to leave all along - just click your heels three times, grab your coat, and sneak out without saying goodbye."

'This chart shows how much time we waste every day looking at charts.'

"My boss had security escort me out of the office today. I'm worried this means I won't be getting a bonus."

"These meetings bring out my creative side. How's this for the boss?"

"Always carry a ball with you! If you are chased by a dog, stop, show the ball and throw it. Believe me, he won't be able to resist chasing it instead of you..."

"The Ususal, Mr. B?"

Nesting dolls stranded on an island send out nesting bottles with messages in each of them.

"It was a dark and stormy night, for the Wi-Fi was down."

"So you're just now tellin' me I was hatched from an egg and I coulda' left years ago?!?"

"Sorry, I'm preaching again. Why don't we pause for a moment while I pass around the collection plate."

'I grew sick of Madison Avenue,so I quit,bought the bar and never looked back.'

Stress

Desert Island Fantasies

'Miss Fenwick - I don't want to see anyone today!'

Tweaking the CV.

"Sorry I'm late. Traffic was fine. I just don't like any of you and don't want to be here."