Elf Themes T-Shirts

"I not only respect women, I look up to them."

'These elves sure are helpful around the house.'

High security Santa's grotto

"A GPS! Thanks guys! It's exactly what I need to guide my sleigh...you know, in light of that unfortunate hunting accident."

Elfie Stick

'You and your 'Rescue the Reindeer' campaign!'

"I've got a bad feeling about this."

Evil elves trying to take advantage of Christmas tree fairies.

'Do I get to take an 'elfie' with Santa, too?'

Wait - If this is a big bag of toys, where's the big bag of dirty laundry? Worst Christmas morning ever.

Halo Frisbee.

"All it will do is move crime to the South Pole."

"I've diligently spent the last eight hours saving an entire colony of elves from a pack of vicious dragons and your only concern is that it is 2 am?"

"Amazon wants to open a facility here due to our friendly labor environment."

'Well, he sure as hell doesn't walk like a C.E.O.'

"Don't even think about it."

"Okay, who's the wise guy elf?"

"He's upset I'm getting 36,000 points for speeding in one night."

"Blessed are they who blow out birthday cakes candles, for they shall be de-lighted."

Accept cookies?

'I'm telling you, I don't have a good feeling about this.'

"You believed you were above everyone else, and deserved to look down on others. This is a clear case of shelf-elf-filling prophecy."

People forget, on the 8th and 9th days I created the long weekend.

Reason # 23 that doors don't make perfect seal against winter winds: Mischievous unemployed elves.

Did You Know That...Scientists in Illinois, USA, claim we would live a longer life if we were more like elves?

"He must be a South Pole elf..."

Full Serve/Elf Serve

Poetry reading nightly

During a respite in union negotiations, simmering tensions boil over as some disgruntled members of the toymakers elf union take matters in their own hands.

Goblin.

'I'm looking for something, like, 364 days a year.'

'Shhhhh...He's preparing for the holiday season.'

Elf and Safety: 'Have you got a seat belt on that thing?'

"That door's no protection against Hobgoblins." - Elf And Safety Inspector

"So, Mr. Claus, there IS a Virginia!"