Elevator Engineer Pillows

'My son wants to become an elevator engineer.'

'I think you are taking this elevator pitch way too literally'.

Wolfgang Amadeus Mozak.

Lift buttons read: East Side/West Side/All Around the Town.

An old-time engineer enters the cockpit on a flight.

Offices moved to 23rd floor - taking the company to new heights - the management.

"This IS my day-to-night outfit"

Going Down?

'That's right, we're going all the way to the top floor ... I'm late for a meeting!'

Thumbing a Lift.

'I'm playing 18 floors.'

Elevator charge $1.00.

A businessman waits for an elevator; on his briefcase are two stickers reading "Up" and "Down".

The guy who got in on the ground floor

"It's not that I'm lazy. But I envisage myself not so much climbing the corporate ladder, as taking the corporate elevator."

'Not only did they install an elevator to help you get over the dam, they also hired an elevator operator.'

Elevator buttons : Rare, Medium, Well done.

HS2 time bomb...

S**t Creek Halt

'Doors opening.' - 'Doors closing.' - 'Doors bored now.'

"I considered riding my bike to work until I realized it involved pedaling and sweat."

"Can you at least pretend to try and hold the elevator so I won't mull over and over how you didn't hold the elevator."

'You can see the excuses in the news now, it will be 'The wrong sort of rain'!'

August 9, 1857: The World's First Elevator Demonstration

Santa Elevator

A Fork-lift.

'Going up?'

Chatty, garlic-coffee breath, apathetic, contagious

"This thing is so slow!"

Railway 'King' George Hudson

"Ah guys, before you push any buttons can I just check my calculator?"

The 6.06 to Brighton overshoots the buffers

"Do we look like we're going up?"

Railway Map of England (A Prophecy)