Electronics Store Owner Pillows

'It's an S.E.C. approved GPS system...'

Dear, could you please pick up some batteries? The ones in the remote are dead and I feel like I'm Amish.

Sale on the same stuff as last week.

Cut Price

Sale! Weed Whackers

"Our business is based on breakthroughs."

'Now I know why they threw in the printer for free. It's only got a resolution of one dot per 8 12 inches.'

Axle greaseMarine greaseElbow grease .

Electronics: Nooks/Crannies

'Don't worry. I'm not charging you for the extra lettering.'

"Can I talk to someone who knows something?"

"It was a mom-and-pop, but we inherited it."

'... and we're also having a sale on do-it-yourself emergency surgery kits.'

'Where do you keep the elbow grease?'

and this little light starts blinking when your computer becomes obsolete

Witch Hardware

'Better buy one now - before they make them too big to fit into your house.'

New! Paint Bombs: 'Light the wick, and you have paint that's extremely easy to apply!'

'Where do you keep the elbow-grease?'

"Fifth robbery this week. That's not a security camera ??" a local TV news station installed it to save time."

'I can watch T.V. shows on the computer, so who needs a TV?'

'Uh-oh.'

'We're starting to build our own house. How much is this two by four?'

Men's Prayer Group.

"You never know what will catch on!"

It's an I-O-Ewe.

"So long, Mr Schwartz. I'm leaving. Nowadays, software's where it's at."

Joan of Arch

"That's closer to the shade of taupe I want, but it's still not quite right!"

Bob's DIY Store

"Alfresco Plumbing & Hardware Supplies"

'Look, we have 7 and we have 5 . . . I make that 75 �' the number of your house!'

'Super size me!!'