Election Cycle Gifts

'If only every year was an election year.'

"Are you excruciatingly, horribly or mildly embarrassed by the election?"

Two Americas

'Obviously we thought he had voted. Back to you Dan.'

Vote for me

The bipartisan election cycle: 'Every 2 years without fail, I perform my patriotic duty and vote the bums out.'

Presidential primaries equal hot air.

'Well, at least he's an honest politician.'

'...And now, stay tuned for 'America's Funniest Presidential Debates'!'

'Why can't they be fair about it? -- Nominate Obama, and give Hillary her own soap opera.'

'So 'don't get mad - get even' is your new campaign slogan?'

Trump Campaign Funding

Trump 2020

"Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, well, I can't admit I made a mistake, now can I?"

They're Not Just That Into It

"This is the most important election of our lifetime."

We Tenatively Oppose War on Strictly Procedural Grounds

'His best qualities are circumventing questions and evading answers.'

'You realize, we can't use the 'benign neglect' method for everything.'

"Away with the warmonger!"

Vehicles are having their own election. These are the candidates. The ambulance appeals to voters who think health care is most important. Voters focusing on education issues favor the school bus. And those wanting family-friendly policies are backing the minivan. The tractor is an expert on agricultural issues, and the import is a free trade advocate. Those voters concerned about environmental issues like the electric hybrid, and those wanting a strong military support the Jeep. What's t

"Excellent, excellent. A fine blend of truths, half-truths, and blatant falsehoods."

"I want to dispel the rumor that this redistricting map was drawn by my toddler on an Etch-A-Sketch. . .I'd never met that toddler before."

'Thank heavens! For a minute there I thought it was the news!'

Trump Poutine

I've Always Wanted to Be Oppressed By Someone Who Looks Like Me

To Err Is Human, to Mess up Big-Time Is Democratic

Political Candidates' Playbook Signals from the sidelines

'We're asking what america can do without to reduce the deficit...no, ma'ma! the Gop and Dems are not options!'

'Why does my opponent keep lying about me?', 'Because truth is stranger than fiction?'

"We've won control of the congress. Our next objective is to win control of the media."

The President Elect approved by 3 out of 4 talk show hosts!

The Russian Election.

"Exactly how undecided would you say you were at this precise moment?"

Unfettered Corporate Campaigning.