Elderly Pillows

"Oh yes, I used to love chasing balls, but now, I'm just content watching you young ones doing it..."

"I think the most rewarding part of caring for elderly parents is when they call you because they don't want to bother the 9-1-1 people."

How Nature Senses a Change in the Weather

'There's old Jim off to the shops. Slowed down a lot these days, ain't he.'

"Why bother?"

"Oh indeed I did: I went feral for a year when I was young. It taught me a lot about the world, but about myself too..."

'You know you're getting old when you take longer to recover than to get tired.'

Every so often, Madeline gets carried away.

"No, I don't want to live forever, but I damn sure don't want to be dead forever, either."

"He should be up and complaining in no time."

"My service animal for Alzheimer's, sonny!"

"You're crappin' in the closet again, Claude."

"I can't stay in this hospital bed too long. Everyone will think I'm too old...too fragile...ready for the home. I'm not ready for that!"

"Careful."

"Wish I could do that." "Better give him a dog treat and a bath first."

Mr. Evers specifically asked for a plain coffee, not an espresso.

"You really need to think about getting glasses."

'You seem quieter tonight. Did they give you something to help you relax?'

Rejuvenile Delinquents.

"At a certain point, I bring them back."

Toothless Meal

Four bites a second is about as fast as anyone can chew.

"I often consult with a higher authority... my grandmother."

'I'm fighting ageing.'

Grandpa gets more than he bargained for when his lawnmower takes flight as a helicopter would.

"Well, Mr. Goddam Fancy-Pants Small-Town-Expose hot shot! What makes you think we don't all have lusty, kiss-and-tell memoirs boiling away inside us?"

"Forget the palm dearie...I'll read yer race."

Remote Control Duck

"I get it! I get it! Elephants never forget. Now quit bragging about it!"

"A gentleman would offer his seat."