Elderly Sports Fans Gifts

'They wanted us to take the knee before kick off, but I was worried half of us might not be able to get up again'

"Good game."

"You think you can? Think again, mister. You know you can. Got that?"

I like the Jets...I guess

'Joe took the day off to go to the ball game. So I'll be sitting in for him until he gets back. Would you like me to fetch you something?'

"Just another 50 decibels on your grunt and we can start to think about letting you hit a few balls!"

'Wow, the field really is a frozen tundra!'

He's in training for the rugby World Cup.

Life with a professional baseball catcher.

'I'm not abandoned. I'm a free agent.'

"Did you know that when my mom played soccer, only the winner got a trophy?"

Xena: Warrior Princess, TV star, professional volleyball player.

Mixed Doubles.

"I wanted to be a baseball player 'til I found out they send you to the showers."

"Wait! Don't start the chase now: I need to stretch first!:

Runner collapsing over the finishing line.

Spring Training

Periscope spies beautiful water-skier.

Raheem Sterling

"It's Zeus' latest obsession."

Venn Diagram: DIamonds

Ted's Brilliant Rugby Career Was Plagued By Nagging Injuries,

Political Candidates' Playbook Signals from the sidelines

The obstetrician doesn't need a close catcher...

"It's World Cup Soccer, Tia Carmen. The U.S. vs England."

'You don't want weather? Not a problem! How about sports, or maybe a nice movie? We can do that! Just put that thing down and let's talk, OK?'

"Would you rather get hit by a racket or chewed by a dog?"

"My wife wanted to see a diamond. So I took her to a ballgame."

A bunch of baseball players sitting on a baseball diamond watching TV.

"Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no!"

'Oh yeah, your dad might be on 4-1 in this afternoon's race, but mine is on 3-1!'

Zeus injects himself with steroids before throwing lightning bolts

'You both know the rules -- walk 1 paces, turn, and tee off on each other.'

"Ohhh...pick me pick me!!"

"Yes! I hit a triple. Woo-hoo."